I Want to Break Free

Chris and I are iced in, but not at the same place. I don’t like that. At all. My anxiety and depression are through the roof and I had to promise him I would make it through the time we’re apart.

So I’m with my parents. Dad’s okay. (Who could have ever anticipated that I’d say that?) Being with mom is not okay. She is completely oblivious to how she’s being and when I finally had an audible retort to her, she said, “I hope you never treat Chris the way you treat me because he will leave you if you do.” I responded, “I won’t because he won’t ever treat me the way you treat me.” Of course this led her to say how much she did for me as a child, and I pointed out that any good that was done didn’t negate all of the bad that was done as a child or as an adult. Abuse can’t be wiped away just because you chaperoned school trips or took me to medical appointments. Congratulations on playing the role of doting mother, but maybe think about the trauma you inflicted as well.

I can get through this, but I will be so happy when I can get out of this house and spend time with my husband and my stepchild again, especially since I’m not getting to spend my kid’s birthday with him.