Tag: sinus infection


The Battle Has Begun

3
January

I am in an epic battle with my sinuses.  (10 points to Gryffindor for the proper use of epic, please?)  They’re not only filled with gross mucus crap (sorry for the visual), but when I get that stuff out I start getting not only the dried blood, but lots of not-so-dried blood, too.  (Again, sorry.) I don’t know why they have suddenly decided to intensify the crappy feeling, but they have.  It may be that I’ve been without my Flonase for around a month now, which I could probably remedy by calling my family doctor (or my allergist or my ENT doctor), but I haven’t done that and I’m not sure if I want to do that.  Well, I would like to have my sinuses not feel like crap, but I’m not sure if fixing that feeling is worth the anxiety of calling any of the doctors.

I still do not know the results from EEG and MRI.  I do need to make that call today.  I was going to call yesterday, but I am pretty sure that the neurologist wasn’t there yesterday and I was asleep for most of the last twenty-four hours.  (I took 2 Flexerils at 4 AM yesterday, then took 2 more at about noon yesterday, and doing that kept me asleep most of the day and night.)  I would probably be asleep right now, but my iPod had reached the red section of the charged bar, so I needed to recharge it so I could listen to music instead of having bad dreams.

It’s pretty damn cold today, which shouldn’t be surprising since it is winter, but it is kind of shocking to the system since I was running around in shorts and short-sleeved shirts last week.  Right now it is 21°F (or -6.1°C) outside (unless you’re in some parts of Madison County where it is 9°F or -12.8°C), so I had to change from my warm weather clothes to my cold weather stuff. I wish that I wore socks right about now because that would keep my feet a bit warmer, but I don’t, so no socks for me.

Oh, I had a weird dream yesterday. It was one of the few bad dreams that I think that I’ve gotten while doing the listening-to-music-the-whole-time-I’m-sleeping thing. I’m not exactly sure how it started, but apparently, different parts of my family actually had money in the dream. My parents and I were living in this huge house in an affluent neighborhood, and the house was right across the street from Deb, Nana’s first cousin who was raised by Mama and Papa (Nana’s parents) after her mom died. Apparently, in the dream, Deb’s husband was involved with an organized crime organization, which would never happen because he is way too nice and too good of a person to be involved in a crime enterprise. Deb had apparently found out and gotten him to turn someone in, and when the group found out, they made him choose between his life and hers, so he basically ordered a hit on her. She was killed in the house my family lived in, which I apparently witnessed, but couldn’t remember because I had some weird form of amnesia. Anytime anyone would bring up her name or what happened, I would start crying or saying that it didn’t happen. It was very, very, very strange.

I had planned on making icons everyday during 2012 for my icon/graphic community, but I haven’t made any so far.  So, I need to make some today.  I was planning on doing some Colin Morgan on the 1st, Kate Bosworth on the 2nd, but I don’t remember who I planned on featuring today.  I guess I could make the first two and do some others today, as well.

Ugh, I need to not pay attention to Rand Paul making his dad sound like this über-cool guy.  I don’t like or trust either of them, don’t get the appeal of either of them, and don’t want either of them involved in decisions of the government.

Comment » | Confessions, Family, General, Like So Totally Me, Sickness and Health

It’s a Blacked Out Blur, But I’m Pretty Sure…

6
November

I hurt. This is not news. I hurt in my head, back, and neck. Again, this is not news. I tend to have weird tastes in my mouth, have trouble being around any light, and need to be laying as far back as humanly possible in order to feel anywhere near normal. This isn’t news to me. This probably isn’t news to anyone who may have listened to me complain every day for the last, oh, year and a half. My mom finally started putting together my complaints the other day. (She’s been remarkably more coherent in the last few days and couple of weeks.)

My mom wants me to go see my neurologist because she thinks that it sounds like a CSF leak. I have been thinking this was a potential issue for about a year now, especially since I started getting some yellow fluid in my ears regularly after my sinus surgery. I don’t bring it up at the doctor because I honestly feel like when I ask about serious issues that doctors might think that I’m being a malingerer or something. I know that I might miss out on getting things fixed by not discussing them with doctors, but I don’t want to come off as a hypochondriac or an attention-seeking whiner. (I don’t like asking for help ever.) Besides, the issue with the headaches/neck and back pains being horribly bad and the fluid being in my ears isn’t necessarily a regular issue. It seems to come and go, so it could be nothing. It could just be random bouts of health crap. My mom thinks it is super-serious, though.

So, I guess that I shall call my neuro doc this week. I am also supposed to call my GI doc about my regular heartburn and my family doctor about my ongoing sinus crap. The more aware my mother seems to be about my health issues, the more doctors she seems to want me to contact. It’s nice that she cares, but I don’t know what good it will do for me to see the doctors. They probably won’t do anything and anything that do try will probably end up causing some other crap. I think I’ve truly given up on doctors at this point.

In other pointless news, Alabama played LSU last night and lost. Somehow, local news had a hard time showing any highlights of LSU from the game, but got in all of the Alabama highlights. Maybe it was a coincidence. Alabama fans are being excessively annoying on Facebook. Apparently, the same people who regularly like to give Auburn fans a hard time when Auburn loses or doesn’t win by a high enough score or when Auburn has a stellar player that Alabama fans don’t like (i.e. Cam Newton) do not want to hear that their team lost, didn’t manage to score a touchdown (Auburn did vs. LSU), and that the referees were actually being kinder to Alabama than they were to LSU. (It was in Tuscaloosa, so having Alabama-loving refs is not unheard of there.) Instead, they’re saying how the referees were being mean to them or that LSU was cheating or other stuff that they normally say when they’re feeling butthurt. I’m glad I’m no longer “friends” with certain people on Facebook (i.e. some family members and Alan) because the Alabama loss would have resulted in a lot of whining from them and even more unusual conspiracy theories.

Oh, I accidentally described (outloud) the attitudes of ‘Bama fans last night as being butthurt to my parents. I then had to try to, nicely, explain what butthurt meant. Ah, sometimes I need to remember that slang does not translate for members of some (older) age groups.

Comment » | 10 Years of Madness, Confessions, Facebook, Family, Friends, Sickness and Health

I Don’t Know If You Can Hear Me or If You’re Even There

2
September

I was going to call the doctor on Thursday, but I apparently slept through quite a bit of it. I didn’t call the doctor today either. Somehow, it just slipped my mind. It seemed like I would do okay, but about an hour and half ago, my coughing fits seemed to get worse. I also noticed that I had started wheezing. So, I have to try to make it through the weekend, which is going to be fun since clinics and physicians’ offices will be closed Monday for Labor Day. If I get too wheezy or short of breath, then I will go to the ER. (Of course, the thought of doing that on a holiday weekend is a bit scary.)

Another scary thing will be happening this weekend, the beginning of college football. While I am okay with expressing adoration towards the Auburn football team when they aren’t playing, I am terrified during the games. My dad, the Auburn superfan, will possibly get angsty or even extremely angry. If the game doesn’t go well, then he will complain quite a bit. I hope it goes well. Last year’s season was relatively smooth for us, but that makes sense because Auburn ended up winning the National Championship. While it is possible for them to win again this year, I know that it is not something that I should just expect to happen.

Oh, in happier news, earlier this week TIME magazine asked their Twitter followers what their favorite non-fiction books were. I, of course, said that Prozac Nation by Elizabeth Wurtzel was my favorite book. Since she has a Twitter account, I also mentioned her account in the response. Anyway, she thanked me. So, this is one of those moments that I am squeeing like an absolute fangirl. I’ve had celebrities add me on Twitter or respond to things that I say before, but I don’t think that I have ever gotten a response from someone I consider to be one of my absolute favorite writers. I know that she can be a controversial person and that some people think that she is whiny or self-involved or various other unfriendly descriptions, but this was the first woman (outside of my family) that I had seen go through some of the very same mental health issues that I had been going through. It helped me to feel like I wasn’t alone and that such intense bouts of depression and mood swings weren’t something that were just isolated to families in the southeastern United States. Her books inspired me to start talking even more openly about my problems, so I really admire her.

In non-health, non-sports, and non-Twitter related “news”, lately Xander (my 11-year old dachshund/golden retriever mix) has been super cuddly. He always liked to be cuddled when he was younger, but after we got Molly (and the other girls) he just kind of started hiding out. Now, he’s decided to get in any laps that he can get in. It is really nice, because I missed having him in my lap during his almost total boycott of lap-lounging. (He would get up in my lap every once in a while, or he would get where he knew I would be sitting and guilt me into picking him up and holding him. The latter was a lot less common, because it took a lot out of me.) Anyway, him being in my lap so much has kind of lowered my stress and anger levels, which is pretty damn cool. Of course, I’m still a frustrated, angry girl sometimes, but I feel a lot calmer than I have in a very long time. And he actually calmed my dad down the other day, which was nice to see.  I just hope that this isn’t some sudden shift in mood that indicates something is wrong with him.  I’m hoping that it just means that he missed being cuddled.

Oh, last week, Nana called and said that my aunt (the one that still isn’t communicating with me) had laser eye surgery.  She apparently had a retinal detachment or tear.  Her normal eye doctor didn’t think anything major was wrong, but she started having floaters plus flashers in her vision so she went to a clinic in Birmingham and found out what was going on.  I’m glad that the Birmingham doctor figured it out.  Not treating retinal detachments/tears can cause very serious problems.

My mom has also had some (not-so-fun) health issues lately.  She’s always got health problems going on, but the past two days, she has woken up with a blood sugar reading under 65.  Last night, she lowered her nightly insulin dose a little, but her sugar was lower today than it was yesterday.  I really hope that she isn’t going to have another bout of hypoglycemia.  I had hoped that she might consider at least calling a nurse at the UAB Clinic to see if they had any ideas for how she could keep her blood sugar high enough so that she didn’t risk going back into a low blood sugar state.  I guess she wants to give it time.  I shouldn’t critique that decision, since I’ve put off getting help for my own issues so many times.

Oh, if you aren’t living in the southeastern part of the United States, then you might not know that there is a Tropical Storm in the Gulf of Mexico.  Tropical Storm Lee is right under Mobile, and it is practically sitting there, not moving much at all.  That might not seem major to those of you who saw how stalling out basically weakened Hurricane Irene, but in the Gulf of Mexico there is a lot warmer water.  The storm can probably sit just off the coast for 72-hours and still get stronger, then come inland and cause major damage.  So, I’m hoping that it isn’t too bad.  On the other hand, it would be nice to have some rain around here.  I just hope it isn’t enough to cause flooding, which is probably an unrealistic hope for me to have.

I hope everyone has a nice weekend.

Comment » | Confessions, Family, Geekery, Internet, Mental Health, Sickness and Health, Twitter

How Much Resistance, Pain, Torture it Endures

30
August

I still have a sinus infection.  This isn’t really news, since I quit taking the Doxycycline after a few doses because (once again) I started throwing up while I was on it.  I haven’t called to get a new appointment to see the doctor because I don’t really know what else he or she (my old doctor has “graduated”) would be able to give me.  I mean, with hives/rash from Penicillin, Ceclor, Septra, and Zithromax; neuropathy from fluoroquinolone toxicity; Biaxin just flat out never working; and now this, I think that the doctor might just throw up their hands and scream as they run out of the room.

Because of my hesitance to go see the doctor again, my mom decided to tell my grandmother that I’m not really all that sick.  When she got off the phone, I asked her what she meant by that.  She claimed she didn’t say it, even though I could plainly hear her.  So, I guess I’m expected to go see the doctor, even with the doubts that anything can or will be done.  I know the infection is worse, since I can actually feel and see that it is worse.  I’ve been coughing a lot lately and if my emotions shift suddenly (i.e. I get scared) or if I just get into a  regular coughing fit, my asthma seems to start playing its whole “I’m going to withhold air from you” card.  That alone should have convinced me to see the doctor, but really I don’t want to go.

So I don’t know if I will be calling the doctor or not.  I guess I probably should, but I just really don’t want to see a doctor.  I’m not really in a mood where I think that doctors can do much of anything for me.  It isn’t really a hopeless feeling as much as it is just something that I have come to expect from them.

I did decide that maybe, before I try calling, I should try doing the sinus rinse thing again.  Unfortunately, the only thing that seemed to happen with it is that it made my ears hurt like hell.  I don’t get how that happened, but it did.  I think that it may have done that at one point, after I had my sinus surgery, but I honestly don’t remember.  All I remember are bad headaches, but the doctors seem to take me more seriously if I at least try the rinse.  I don’t get why they think that salt water up the nose should work for everyone, but I guess that they have their reasons.

I really wish I could go for more than one or two entries without mentioning doctors or being sick or hurting.

Comment » | Confessions, Family, Sickness and Health

The Elephant In The Room

14
July

Yesterday, I was finally able to go get my ears checked out.  The doctor determined that I have a sinus infection, which I already knew.  (It never got better from the last time I had one in April.)  He declared it was my sinuses causing the problem he had examined my ears, sinuses, glands, throat, heartbeat, and lungs.  He also asked if I had had pressure when I would try to blow my nose.  I told him that I had never really been able to blow my nose.  (I tried to learn how after the sinus surgery last year, but I never really caught on about how you do it without encountering the whole ear-bubble feeling.)

Before he went to ask his attending what antibiotic he could give me (because my reactions are so super-fun), he asked me if I realized that I am overweight.  It was one of those comments that is supposed to represent a question, but is not really fully stated because the asking party is a bit embarrassed.  I told him that I knew that I am obese and that everything that I have ever tried for weight loss has resulted in me staying at a fairly high weight.  I mentioned the gastric bypass surgery, which led to him asking how long it had been and if I still saw my surgeon.  He also asked if anyone had checked my blood for the post-surgery standard work-up.  I told him that my blood gets checked fairly often.  Oh, and he asked if I had ever had my thyroid checked.

I’m wondering how many people who are significantly overweight to morbidly obese don’t realize that their weight is high or haven’t had their thyroid checked.  I’ve had mine tested so many times by so many doctors that I can’t imagine any doctor thinking that by the age of 27 that it wouldn’t have been tested.  I also would think that if this particular doctor had looked at the lab report section of my chart that he might have seen that yes, I’ve had it tested.  (Since it is on the computer and is fairly easy/quick to find anything that is available, I don’t see why he couldn’t do that.)

Oh well.  When he came back from his attending, he wanted to put me on Keflex.  I immediately asked him if this was a wise idea.  I thought that may it wouldn’t be very smart to give someone who has both a penicillin allergy and a Ceclor allergy a drug that has warnings against dispensing to people with either type of allergy.  When I started my question, all I got out before he interrupted me was the penicillin allergy.  He told me that it would be okay since it was a cephalosporin and not a drug from the penicillin family.  (They are related, though.)  When I finally got out the Ceclor allergy, he realized that he couldn’t give Keflex to me.  His next try was Cipro, since it had been given to me by the clinic before.  I threw up a red flag at that one, too.  I’m not technically allergic to it, but once you have a reaction in the toxicity group, you can no longer take any from that group of drugs.  So, he settled for Doxycycline.  He wanted to know what I’d had it for in the past, and I told him that it was prescribed for this same infection.  I don’t think he believed it could be the same infection.  He clearly doesn’t know my immune system, then.

So, maybe this round of antibiotics will work.  Hopefully it will.

2 comments » | Confessions, Sickness and Health

To Be Young and Judgmental

8
June

So, I was really planning on talking anymore about the video thing. I changed my mind when I was on the brother of the troll’s Facebook profile and saw this exchange:

C: Well don’t send your cousins video to Tosh.O!!! Because that’s not nice at all either!! LOL!
K: It’s not like it was Sami’s video!
C: She should get a web redemption..
K: And if I wouldn’t have done that….she would have never been able to be considered for one!

As you might be able to tell, the culprit is K and the brother is C. I’m a bit shocked that K doesn’t even seem to realize that what she did is wrong. I shouldn’t be, since the Morris family is full of folks who lack remorse. Still, I was a bit hopeful that maybe my generation and my dad’s generation would be able to overcome the sociopathic tendencies of some of our ancestors.

At least when I say and do crappy stuff, I have a twinge of remorse over what I’ve done.  Usually, I go around apologizing for everything I do because I know that I have a tendency to hurt other people.  I guess she didn’t inherit the excessive guilt gene.  Maybe that comes from my mom or from my dad’s mom or the combination.

I also find her lack of realization that I might, you know, see the exchange or find the video submission a little alarming.  Talking about another human being like they aren’t (a person) is a bit…well, rude.  I also love how being the daughter of her mother’s first cousin makes me less family than being her first cousin.  I get how people could see first cousins as being really close, though I’ve never been close with my first cousins.  (My issue is the whole age difference.)  Still, I think of second cousins as still being close enough to still be family.

I guess I shouldn’t be shocked, because the Morris genes do lend to bad behavior.  And her grandfather and my grandfather weren’t exactly all buddy-buddy.  (Hers lost the family house; mine never forgave him for that.)  I don’t even think I’ve met that uncle because of their squabbles.  I guess I’m not supposed to be close with folks from that line.  We’re like the Hatfield and McCoy clan, except it’s the one Morris sibling’s line versus the other sibling’s line.  (Luckily, it appears that the children & grandchildren of the other 9 siblings [that made it to adulthood--one didn't] of my grandfather seem to get along better with my line.)

Oh well…at least I won’t have to be as careful about my anti-Navy sentiments.  (My mom’s dad was in the Army, and though my dad’s dad was Navy, I’m still more of an Army girl.)

Comment » | 10 Years of Madness, Confessions, Facebook, Family, Geekery, Hyperaware, Internet, So Damn Special, YouTube

Are You 5 or Something?

3
June

My “cousin” decided that before she unfriended me on Facebook (unfriending family members is such a nice thing to do) that she would post the video of me singing on Tosh.0′s website with the caption of:

By the way, this is my cousin’s video. NOT ME! I just thought itwas unethical for me not to submit her “talent” to one of the most popular shows on air! I hope you enjoy!”

It also was tagged “You should give up!”, which I guess was her opinion.  She’s entitled to that opinion, but I think that if she was going to make fun of me or say shit about me, then she should have the cojones to say it to my face.  Maybe it was that she was pissed about this post (which contained many of the same things that I had said in arguments with her) or that I am pretty much the exact opposite of her.  (She’s in the Navy, I’m anti-war.  She’s conservative, I’m liberal.  She’s proud of being a Morris, I feel like she doesn’t understand what it is like to truly grow up in our family.)  Maybe she got sick of the crap that was going back and forth between me and people that she didn’t even know.

It was hard enough for me to post that video without this happening.  I figured that if anyone was going to be immature about it, it would be someone that I’m not related to and have no connection to in any way, shape, or form.  Apparently, I was wrong.  When the trolls are in your own family, it’s a bit appalling.

I know that I’ve talked my fair share of shit about family members on here.  I know that it’s been labeled immature and other things by those family members.  You know what’s different about my posting it?  The family members know that they are being talked about.  Before I started blogging about them, they got the URL to this site.  They got to read it.  It wasn’t really behind their backs and it wasn’t anything that I was, in any way, ashamed for them to see.  Even when I talked about her on Hyperaware, she could have easily found it.  I have the link of the site posted on my Facebook profile, the Facebook page for that site, on this site, on my last.fm, on my tumblr, etc.  I submitted the site for search engines. I didn’t hide it.  I didn’t shy away from telling her.  So, what was said by me about her was not hidden.  She could easily find it.

Talking about me behind my back, which is what this seemed like, indicates some form of guilt.   If you feel guilty because of your words, maybe you shouldn’t be saying them?

I have no problem telling some people what I think of them.  If I don’t like you, I’m not generally going to shy away from saying it.  And I will openly say it because I don’t have the kind of filters that people are expected to have.  I have always been blunt and upfront.  I’ll be polite in the right settings, but if I think you’re doing something I don’t like, I will call you on it.

The only things that I don’t say in a more upfront way are things that I’m not ready for the whole world to know about–meaning that if I’m not upfront about it, then you probably aren’t going to find it on the internet.  And if you do, then it will not be as easy as checking the video statistics on a YouTube video.

As for her criticism, it’s her opinion.  I happen to know that I have perfect pitch and that I had enough talent to make the choir for the top singers in Huntsville not one but 6 times.  I also know that I was good enough to be offered a spot at the local arts high school. I know that my voice may not be in stellar shape, due to the sinus infection and the chronic dry mouth from the Sjögren’s, but I tried.  I also know that my poor body image (which has to do with things done within the Morris family) and and paranoia makes me feel sometimes like the world is out to get me, but I still was willing to put myself out there, which is more than I can say for her. So, if she thinks that I can’t sing, then that’s on her.  I tried.  I put myself out there.  If she thinks she’s so good, then I dare her to get on YouTube and post a video of herself singing.  If she’s got that great of an opinion of herself, then she needs to put herself out there.  Go big or go home, sweetie.

Also, if you’re going to troll, do it right.  I mean, this makes normal trolling look like fine art.  It shouldn’t have been THAT easy to find if she didn’t want to get caught.  There’s a good reason that one rule of being a troll is “Anonymous is legion.”  If you’re going to get your lulz on, then at least do it by proxy.  Do it right or don’t do it at all.

I will be so glad when this week is over.  The fights, the trolling, etc. is really making this look like one of the worst weeks ever.  Of course, this didn’t really make me sad or even all that stressed.  Mainly, it just made me feel disappointed.  I kind of respected her before, but now…not so much.

2 comments » | Facebook, Family, Geekery, Hyperaware, YouTube

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