Do I Get to Be Ingrid Bergman?

gaslighting accusation

Of all the things I have ever been accused of, gaslighting isn’t one of them. It’s probably because I don’t gaslight.1 In order to gaslight, one must lie about or distort the events that happened. Taking a screen capture of words a person actually says and showing that to them is not gaslighting. If I were distorting what happened to show her she was wrong, then I would be gaslighting. But showing her exactly what happened is not gaslighting. Suggesting that I was gaslighting might actually be gaslighting on her part, but I wouldn’t tell her that. Mainly because I refuse to talk to her anymore. I made the mistake of trying to respond after what happened yesterday and some of her remarks towards me that she made, so she got all huffy.2

I loved that she told me I needed help. She’s right. I am. I do need help. I get as much help as I can receive. My needing help doesn’t change the facts about what happened. It doesn’t change how she is being hypocritical. It doesn’t change anything that she has done. And I really don’t appreciate her bringing up my mental health as a way to pretend like she is completely free of blame. I definitely feel like my decision to placate her the other night was a pretty smart one to make.

And accusing me of hating men? Can someone please tell me where I’ve said that I hate men? Or that I support any form of terrorism against any group at all? No. Why? The proof doesn’t exist because I’ve never felt that way about any group at all. But, like I told her, if it makes her feel better to accuse me of things, then she can accuse me of things. That just ends up saying more about her than it does about me anyway.

Ugh. Annoying people are annoying, guys. I know I can be annoying, too. Still, the stubbornness and denial that she seems to have is just exhausting for me. I think Dadada would enjoy her tactics, though. His theory in life was that it was only wrong if you got caught. I think he would appreciate the idea of if you get caught, deny, deny, deny. It takes chutzpah. It also makes me really glad I’m now blocking her.3

And I’m still getting responses from her friends. I’m trying to be nice to them, which is getting more and more difficult. I may have to just start blocking any of them that try to talk to me. That may be the smartest (and least dramatic) thing to do.


  1. To gaslight is to manipulate (someone) by psychological means into questioning their own sanity. It involves providing them with false or distorted information. 

  2. Thus, I have updated the gallery from yesterday. 

  3. I just have to keep myself from checking to see if she’s still saying shit about me. 

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Janet Morris

I'm from Huntsville, Alabama. I've got as many college credits as a doctorate candidate, and the GPA of some of them, too. I have a boss by the name of Amy Pond. She's a dachshund. My parents both grew up in Alabama.

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