Beating Around the Bush


On my birthday, I called the orthopedist. Well, my mom dialed the numbers, but I did actually talk to the receptionist and schedule an appointment for the annoying and easily triggered appendage that is otherwise known as my left thumb. The soonest that they could get me in was on the morning of March 17, so while a bunch of people claiming to be Irish just so they can imbibe and get totally sloshed, I will be trying to explain to the orthopedist that apparently my thumb wants to be a statistical anomaly. (Goodness, that’s a run-on sentence, isn’t it?) Not that I would be getting drunk that or any other day if I weren’t seeing the doctor.

My dad cringed when I told him because that means he has to be awake1 before his normal wake-time. I told him that it was either that or March 19, which is a Wednesday, which means that it’s the day that Kroger has their senior discount. He doesn’t like doing anything other than go grocery shopping on Wednesday, unless someone else goes shopping instead of him. (In that case, he prefers doing absolutely nothing on Wednesday.) He became okay with the idea of a morning appointment when I pointed this out.

So now I get to wait around, with a very sore left thumb and a right one that is starting to hurt, for the next month. Fun. I’m just glad it wasn’t an even longer wait. And I’m hoping when I see him that the solution won’t be anything that requires surgical intervention, because I know that at some point, if the pain keeps coming back, that that might become an option. Fingers crossed, right? (But not thumbs because that would just be too painful.)


  1. because of my inability to drive because I have the whole dizziness while driving thing 


About Janet Morris

I'm from Huntsville, Alabama. I've got as many college credits as a doctorate candidate, and the GPA of some of them, too. I have a boss by the name of Amy Pond. She's a dachshund. My parents both grew up in Alabama.