I hate having people touch my stuff. I am not quiet about this objection. I don’t like people to touch things that belong to me. I don’t like people to touch me. Touching and I are not good friends. I have intense bouts of anxiety and panic when people start touching my stuff, even if they’re just trying to help me organize. I start feeling like my mind is on fire and like if the whole situation continues that I will end up suffering something horrible.
So, why is it that suddenly today, while I was watching the Secret Life of the American Teenager, my father decided that he would start putting my things that I have had in a box by my recliner in another box? The old box broke, so I guess he was trying to be nice. I should be appreciative, but it just felt like thing huge invasion of my space. I know he probably didn’t mean to upset me, but it upsets me when people touch my stuff. I would expect him to know this, especially considering the number of times that I’ve freaked out when my things were touched by other people.
Yet again, I am sitting here trying to stop a full-blown panic attack from happening because he was going through my things. And I can’t tell him that it upset me because he will get defensive and angry and I’ll be reminded how ungrateful this makes me sound, which will just make things in our house more tense and more frustrating.
Why is it that people keep pushing the touching issue? Clearly, it is something that I just cannot handle. So, why is that I keep on having to deal with it? I know it seems unreasonable for me to expect people to understand this boundary issue, but it just one that I have. It is one that I have to have for my own sanity. If I had to deal with the thought of people just going through my things whenever they wanted, then I would probably need to spend some time in a nuthouse again…and I don’t want to do that. So, I just want people to get this.