Harry Potter and the Something of Anything, J.K. Rowling


There may be some people here who say “but J.K. Rowling is actually a for-shit writer, and children should be reading the glorious established British children’s writers like Lloyd Alexander and Tolkien and Lewis and Wynne-Jones (THEY ARE RIGHT ABOUT WYNNE-JONES) and Susan Cooper and blah blah blah and not these fuckin’ toothpaste commercial Americanized things.”

And I say, a) you like great books!, and b) FUCK YOU, and c) you should say exactly what you’ve just said, but replace “J.K. Rowling” with “Stephenie Meyer” and then put Rowling’s name back in after Susan Cooper.  Okay?

Because Harry Potter is mad awesome, even if it did result in my father pointing a pencil at his glasses whenever they fall apart and saying “Oculus Repairo!”

And I don’t want to harsh Stephenie’s mellow, because I have read all of her books, and named my filly “Bella,” (WHICH IS NOT THE SAME AS NAMING A BABY AFTER A TWILIGHT CHARACTER, AND HER EXISTING NAME WAS ‘FIFI,’ SO BACK OFF) but they are a) bad, and b) really bad, and c) sort of tease you by being just a little BDSM-y, and then are Reactionary Tools of the Patriarchy after all.

Alright, just so you know where I stand.

Are people ever going to get tired of comparing the two series?  It seems like a futile thing to do.  

About Janet Morris

I'm from Huntsville, Alabama. I've got as many college credits as a doctorate candidate, and the GPA of some of them, too. I have a boss by the name of Amy Pond. She's a dachshund. My parents both grew up in Alabama.