I Killed My Dad Last Night


No, I didn’t actually murder him. Nor did I order him killed. I was actually talking to him, kind of ranting about how I think that after the almost 15 years of talking to people on the internet, I have finally come to a very simple conclusion…people just don’t know what sarcasm is anymore. Now, I’ve come to similar conclusions over the years, but never one quite this profound. So I’m expounding on the lack of interpretive skills when it comes to the sarcastic jokes that I or others may occasionally use when he gets upset and says, “I’m dead!” Now, I can tell by this angsty expression that it is apparently all my fault that his Dark Orbit ship thing got destroyed because I should know better than to expect him to pay attention to me when he is playing that game. I’m also not supposed to talk when he’s playing with blip, except to guess the songs he’s playing by his singing and/or dancing, and when he’s playing online rpg football. Basically, while my father is awake, I am not to talk to him, EXCEPT to tell him when it is: time to take the dogs out OR when it is supper time, at which time I am only allowed to tell him of the time, but not allowed to talk while he is eating because he’s playing and eating. I am also encouraged to tell him anytime I unload the dishwasher, since it is his duty to load it. Of course, I am expected to talk to him if he talks to me, and I am expected to listen/be interested in everything he does online. So, when I decided to regale him with this little discovery, he gets pissed because its my fault that his ship gets destroyed. Now, he’s wasted 8 million credits or something and he has to earn them again.

Despite this ranting about him getting upset, it wasn’t actually a bad experience. If you know anything about my father, and very, very few of you actually do, as it is something that pretty much I do not discuss online, him getting a little upset for a few minutes is not too bad. Besides, when he thinks that he’s upset me, he sometimes does stuff for me. Now, I know this is a sign of an abusive relationship (he being the abuser), which I will confess right now is absolutely the case, but there is always the benefit of being rewarded for being treated like crap. I guess in that aspect, I’m an optimist…or a masochist.

Anyway, my reward for the snapping was that he spent an extra hour trying to get my laptop connected to the home network. Of course, the sucky part was that I was in the middle of doing icons because I didn’t feel in the mood to work on any of my fanlistings. He kind of disturbed this. Oh well, for a few minutes the internet worked, and that distracted me. Then it stopped and I got back to work.

Oh, you may have noticed my little plugs. I think I’ve mentioned Turn Left Icons, my icon archive, but I don’t believe I have mentioned that I have ventured back into the world of fanlistings. I have a new fanlisting collective (previous collectives have been: True Blue Girl and Simply Amorous), Stay Frosty, and I have quite a few (10) fanlistings that I need to work on and upload. I’m always the busy bee…helps distract from angry dad, disability clerical errors, and doctors who give up after one test.


About Janet Morris

I'm from Huntsville, Alabama. I've got as many college credits as a doctorate candidate, and the GPA of some of them, too. I have a boss by the name of Amy Pond. She's a dachshund. My parents both grew up in Alabama.