I just sent an application this morning to another university in town to see if I could pursue a degree in psychology while I’m waiting on the lawsuit. I also sent it because I’m really afraid to go back to my old school because I think that people there will give me a hard time over the suit. I’m not as naive as I seem. I know that people can take it out on you when you try to prove to them that they’re wrong.
I’m going on Tuesday to see my new therapist. She isn’t completely new to my life. She’s Stephanie’s old case worker. (I can only see Licensed Clinical Social Workers because I’m on Medicare.) I think I’ll be comfortable with her, but I’m not completely sure yet. If I’m not comfortable, then after my intake, I can always request a new therapist. This will make for about 10 different therapists that I’ve seen since I was eight.
So why the new therapist? Well, I could no longer afford to see my psychiatrist, so I had to switch back to the Mental Health Center. 
It sucks. I have an intake to go through with the therapist, then a psychiatric evaluation to go through on March 21st. Not cool. They asked what my diagnoses were on the form, and I marked a few because I’ve been diagnosed with a few. Actually the only one listed that I hadn’t been diagnosed with was Schizophrenia, though it was suggested that I have it back about 4 years ago, and Schizoaffective Disorder is in that class of problems.
I had to go to crisis counseling on Tuesday when I went to sign up to go back to the Mental Health Center. Why? Well, apparently, I was deemed to be in crisis. I had marked that I had a lot of symptoms over the past 48 hours, including feeling hopeless, seeing things, and hearing things. The person scheduling me was like, “You’re not on anything for the psychotic symptoms.” I pointed on the form to the Abilify and told her I was. The thing about it is, I barely recognize that I have those symptoms most days, even when I have them. Eventually, I think you can just get used to having them.
