Not Quite Normal 18

I went to the “crazy doc” today. I think he’s psychic (not really) because he asked about my racing thoughts, and I don’t think I’d ever said anything to anyone at Mental Health about racing thoughts. I know its a common symptom of being bipolar, but still, not every patient has it, so how did he know I had it? He decreased my Effexor again and increased my Lamictal to 200 mg once I finish the starter pack. He also increased my Geodon to 120 mg. My mom said that he’s probably about to take me off of Effexor, which scares the crap out of me. I’ve been on it for almost 4 years and, with the exception of the few months I was off of it in 2003 (in preparation for surgery), I’ve never done well when I chose not to take it. I’ve always gotten more psychotic and depressed when I went off of it. I don’t see how taking me off of it will be a good thing for me. I wonder if he’s planning on putting me on another antidepressant. It better not be Paxil or Celexa or MAOIs. Okay, I’ve never been on a MAOI, but I refuse to go on a drug that will not allow me to have cheese and has a limit on chocolate. As for the Paxil and Celexa, they’ve been tried in the past and don’t work with me, so there would be no point in putting me on them. Besides, I wouldn’t take them if he did prescribe them for me, and I would tell him that.

I need to read something in my World Literature book so that I can write a paper this weekend. I’ll probably have to read as I write because otherwise, the paper will be crappy because I won’t know what I’m saying.

My ear still hurts, which I guess is normal for an ear that “doesn’t look normal”. I wish my doctor would be more specific about what my ear looks like. Saying that it doesn’t look normal doesn’t give me any answers. He did say it looks red and swollen inside, but that’s it. He marked on the superbill thing that I had an middle and outer ear infection, but he never said that to me. Maybe he doesn’t know what’s wrong. I mean, that’s a bit obvious with him wanting me to go to see the ENT.

I added a page under “About Me” for my mental health issues. It lists when I was diagnosed with what and what drugs I’ve been on. It also lists information on each diagnosis, though I couldn’t really explain the bipolar and obsessive compulsive tendencies, since those aren’t really talked about on sites about mental health.

About Janet Morris

I'm from Huntsville, Alabama. I've got as many college credits as a doctorate candidate, and the GPA of some of them, too. I have a boss by the name of Amy Pond. She's a dachshund. My parents both grew up in Alabama.

18 thoughts on “Not Quite Normal

  • Emily
  • Janet
    Post author

    I don’t know. Maybe because my depression was pretty bad while I was on it. Or he may want to try something different because of the bipolar stuff. I really don’t know why he’d want to change it, but I’m so scared now that he will want to.

  • Lauren
  • Beth

    Just curious, but has your doctor ever mentioned Wellbutrin to you? I read your blog and don’t recall seeing it on there, maybe I overlooked it. It really helped me out when I took it. I too suffer from depression. My father is bipolar. It’s a hard thing to cope with. Wellbutrin helped me but about 9 months before I got pregnant I decided to ween myself off of it. I just didn’t want to be dependent on a medication. I have a weird phsycological issue with taking things daily. Good luck!

  • Jennifer

    That’s crazy about your ear.
    I’d be scared if that’s all the doctor said to me about it. I think I woul dhave been asking a lot of questions.
    It freaks me out when doctors don’t even know what’s going on with things. Isn’t that their job? lol.

  • Kelly

    Im sure your ear will end up fine ๐Ÿ™‚ I had tubes put in mine when i was younger because the canals were too small and i kept getting recurring ear infections.

    I was suppose to goto the ENT last year because of an odd throat problem i was having.. buti never went. Oh well. Too scared :-\

  • Marie

    Good luck with finding the right meds! I myself may need to start trying some new ones. It seems after a while they stop working. Bipolarness is a neverending battle ๐Ÿ™

  • Chelsea

    Wow – your medication schedule sounds really complicated. Good luck to you figuring it out. You’ll do great on the paper, I’m sure.. just take your time and don’t try and rush it or else you’ll goof up.

  • Janet
    Post author

    I’ve noticed that they stop. The Risperdal stopped working, and the Effexor (as much as I love it) seems to not be doing its job anymore. My mom has to change out medicines every few years because hers stop working. I guess its something about the disease and its struggle to make our bodies/minds work a certain way.

  • Janet
    Post author

    Yeah, he’s a psychiatrist. I saw him once a month ago, but this was a recheck. I have another appointment next month. It’s good to have visits scheduled every month, instead of every other month or two with visits with a nurse in the meantime. That was part of the problem with the old psychiatrist.

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