Okay, I have a feeling I put people off by the last post. I kind of figured it would, but it was just something that I had to do.
So, why am I basically begging for presents from people online?
As many of you know, my dad only has a part-time job, which makes money tight around here. That means Christmas will be quite small this year. I know I should just be happy to spend time with my family, but as many of you also know, my depression/psych issues have gotten worse lately. I need some bit of joy on Christmas. Actually, I need it everyday, but I’ll settle just for Christmas. Knowing people care enough to send me something or think about me or whatever will help me to get that level of joy. That probably sounds pathetic, but I don’t know…when I get depressed, I get materialistic. I know the stuff won’t make my depression go away, but just getting things seems to dull the ache for a little while.
So, why did I offer advertising in return for presents?
I wanted to give something back. I don’t want people to just get nothing. I wish I had the ability to give presents to all of my friends online. I would love to buy them something, but I can’t. All I can do is offer something I can afford…advertising.
Do I expect to get anything?
No. I know that people don’t like to buy things for people they don’t know. I also know that people have other things they want to spend their money on. I know that its is completely unrealistic to expect even 1 thing of lip gloss from my wishlist.
So, if I know I’m not going to get anything, why do I still ask?
It never really hurts to ask. Yeah, I may put some people off, but who knows? It might pay off.
So, would I be doing this if I had money this year?
Probably not. I don’t think I would even be spending money on myself. I would probably adopt an angel from the Salvation Army’s Angel Tree. (An angel is a child who comes from a needy family and who won’t be getting Christmas presents, so you go out and buy a child’s entire Christmas.) I’ve done this before and it gives me joy. I just don’t have the money to do it this year, and I didn’t have the money to do it last year either. It’s amazing how wonderful it makes you feel, even when you’re depressed. It allows me to be materialistic, but for another person.
So, does this explain the last post?
I hope so.