LOL…I’m a ditz! I always come to OD on my notes page. (I just pull down the history page and click on the ‘jadimo – Read All Notes’ thing. Well, today, I clicked on it and I forgot that one time when I was checking my notes (it was a couple of days ago…my history on the thing isn’t always the LAST sites I went to) I was trying to find an old OD friend’s diary and it was like a month or so ago. Well, I clicked on it and I had this page with notes that were a few months old and I was wondering why I had so many notes that were so old and where my newer notes are. Then, I looked at the bottom and I realized I was a few hundred notes in, instead of on the 1-30 page. LOL…I can be such a ditz.
Yesterday, I had to do something that I didn’t know if I had the guts to do. I left the Buffy Board. With college coming up, I just wasn’t going to have time. And I grew up. I mean, there were certain things that had bugged me for a while. You see, there was always a tradition of attacking “evil” newbies. I wasn’t attacked and neither were several of the other people, because we were “likable”. Actually, it was because of the way we introduced ourself. One of the reasons that some people used for attacking these people was the way they’d spell things. What about my friend who has dyslexia and another learning disability? She’s smart and going to college this fall. However, if you were to read a message board post or an e-mail, you might not be able to tell it…especially, if it were the first time. So, why do people automatically call people who are different “stupid”? There is usually an underlying cause.
And calling all teenage mothers sluts? That bugs me. Many of them are FAR from being sluts. *Mommy-ness* & Mevs… were implied as being sluts, but they’re not. Yes, they’re 19 year old mothers, but they’re also married. Since when does having sex with your husband count as sluttiness? Some girls get pregnant with they’re long-time love, husband, or by rape. Now, those don’t exactly fit my standard of the word ‘slut’. Yet, some girls who don’t get pregnant can be VERY slutty. Why is it that, unless someone gets pregnant or gets an STD, people who have sex are just regular people? Sometimes, accidents happen. Sometimes, it’s planned, when a couple decides to have a baby. I don’t think we can determine what’s best for everyone, just for ourselves.
I have to rant sometimes.
My mom, dad, and I talked about college some more last night. I’m not going to go to the Decatur campus of Calhoun and I’m not going full-time. I’m going to go part-time at the intown campus. Instead of English, Math (don’t know which because I haven’t taken the placement test), Biology and Psychology, I’ve decided I want to take Psych and Sociology my first semester. I need to ease in. Of course, it’ll be evening classes, because that’s all they offer here. When we were talking, we decided that the English class would possibly get me my former 11th grade English teacher and I didn’t like her. (She liked my poetry and my ability to comprehend the subjects (and sing when my tape didn’t work), but she and I didn’t really like each other on a more personal basis. She thought I was trying to skip class, when I had to leave a bit early because of my knee and my broken foot. :oP Can you blame me if it were true? Which, of course, it wasn’t.) Then, the math classes can end up being taught by the engineers from the local aerospace companies (i.e. Boeing, Lockheed Martin, the Arsenal (okay, so that’s a Fed thing), etc.) and that would NOT be good.
I talked to my friend Maggie last night and she asked me if I ever wanted to go back to high school. I did have some regrets. I mean, I’ll never get all the lovely Senior year stuff. I’ll never get to go to my own prom. (I quit before the Junior/Senior prom.) But…I can’t go back. I mean, it was so hard on me. Yes, I had plenty of friends and the courses were easy. I just hated the politics. I hated not having the ability to pick and choose what I wanted to do. I hated the thought of being controlled. I want to have control of my destiny, and not have some guy down in Montgomery have his senior staffers come up with what classes I HAVE to take to succeed in life. Besides, if I had gone back the 2nd semester of 11th grade from homebound, I would’ve been 1/2 a year behind, because I only got 4 .5 credits. If I had waited until this fall, I’d be a Junior again. I didn’t want that. If I was going to graduate, it was going to be with MY class and no one else. So, I told her that and she understood. I also told her that I’m planning on going to all the football games that I can make it to this fall and she was happy.
Speaking of football…I’ve decided I’ve waited long enough before talking to a certain football player again. I can’t call him (I want to, but it’s impossible for me, right now.) and he never gets online anymore, so I’m having to write him a letter. This time, I’m not going to tell him how I feel about him. I’m just going to tell him that I miss hanging out with him and talking to him. I’m also going to tell him that I need to have him let me know that he at least got the letter. I need to know that he wants me as a friend. I mean, the time I actually did get to talk to him when I called, he acted like he did and he told me to call him back the next day…and I couldn’t. It was too hard. It takes me a month to work up the courage to call someone (longer for this boy) and with school starting, it’s just impossible…
Well, I need to go for now. TTYL!